Parents
People Are Sharing Things That Were Common For Older Generations But Are No Longer Considered “Normal”
The times are constantly changing, and what was popular for one generation may become out of fashion or even taboo for the next. So Redditor u/Bigbumoffhappy asked, “What is a thing that your parents consider normal that you don’t anymore?” Here’s what people said, including members of the BuzzFeed Community.
1. “Not showing affection or saying I love you. Years ago, my brother was admitted to the hospital. We didn’t know what was wrong with him, which was scary. I had been crying, and my dad was very upset, too. As we were walking out of the hospital together, I went to reach for his hand. I thought it would be comforting, a sign that I would be there for him. He ripped his hand away from mine so fast. I was stunned and never tried to do that ever again.”
2. “The idea that a college degree is everything. Sure, it’s important, but degrees are generally extremely specific nowadays. My degree would never even get me an interview in many fields.”
3. “Being able to unplug from everything: I often just unplug from everything; turn off my phone or put it on silent and keep it away from me, pour a glass of wine, and read to my heart’s content. It’s still so nice to be able to disconnect from everything and be unavailable. I don’t think kids today know how to do that.”
4. “Just ‘getting a job’ by walking in anywhere. Throughout my adult life, whenever I needed work, my dad continued suggesting that I just show up at an office and ‘don’t leave until they let you talk to a manager and hand them your resume yourself.’ Poor younger me tried this, and I wandered to every business to find my first job, hearing back from exactly no one.”
5. “Not talking about any negative emotions. They could handle me being happy, but anytime I was sad, upset, depressed? Nope, they didn’t want to see it or deal with it. My mom would even say, ‘What the hell do you have to be so upset about?'”
6. “Being at least four hours early to the airport. I think everyone can relate here.”
7. “Fat shaming. Yes, Mother, I know I’ve put on a few pounds. You don’t have to point it out. Making comments about someone’s physical appearance is not as acceptable nowadays as it once was.”
8. “Showing blind obedience towards elders and authorities. For example, my dad told me not to take time off work to visit him when he was in the hospital because it would leave a bad impression on my boss. I don’t want a boss who judges me for visiting my father in a hospital. Of course, I’m not saying we shouldn’t be respectful, but we should be respectful of everyone, regardless of age, position, or any other variable.”
9. “Checking the newspaper for everything from weather and movies to TV and job listings. They have phones, but using Google to search for these things is a bridge too far.”
10. “How utterly unsupervised we were as little children. I remember taking care of my brother alone for the full summer while my parents worked starting at eight; he was four.”
11. “There was SPF 2 and 4. That’s it. And to get a tan, women rubbed themselves down with baby oil.”
12. “Drinking and driving. My friends’ parents would pick me up with a scotch on the rocks! And ashtrays full of smokes!”
13. “Traveling for pleasure used to be practiced only by the upper class. It was WAY too expensive for the majority of families in the United States. Most middle-class families would, at most, travel by car for eight hours to reach a cheap beach location and rent a yucky motel room with their kids for one week per summer. And those families ‘had it good.’ Now it is common to see many young people flying to destination locations around the world solo or with friends, despite their income level.”
14. “I always feel compelled to answer the phone when it rings. In fact, I just got my Dad to stop doing this. He was so frustrated with telemarketing calls — over 20 in one evening — that I convinced him to let it ring. I assured him they would call back if it were an actual caller or an emergency. He’s much happier now.”
15. “Thinking you’re ‘supposed’ to raise your kids the same way you were raised. I don’t get the reasoning behind that. My parents so often said, ‘Well, that’s the way I was raised.’ Yeah, so maybe it’s time to do things differently.”
16. “Smoking in restaurants. At the Denny’s near us, you had to walk through the smoking section to get to the non-smoking section. Made the concept of everybody being in the same room anyway worse.”
17. “Corporal punishment for children. I thought it was ‘normal’ for most of my childhood.”
18. “Downplaying mental health. I was told to ignore my bullies, which got me nowhere but wanting to stay home ‘sick’ all the time in junior high. When I asked for counseling, I was told I didn’t need it.”
19. “Saying ‘blood is thicker than water’ and expecting people to allow a toxic relative back into our lives and putting up with it because ‘they’re family.’ In other words, not setting healthy boundaries. This stopped with me.”
20. “Up until 1974, a woman could only get a credit card under her husband’s name.”
21. “Racism. My parents are in their 70s and definitely from a ‘different time.’ God, I hate that excuse.”
22. “My mother told me once that when she was younger, around the ’60s or ’70s, she went to the dentist, and her dentist spent the entire appointment ranting about how another woman patient had the audacity to show up wearing pants instead of a dress or skirt. Apparently, it was common to dress nicely for simple things like going to the dentist.”
23. “Going to work when you’re sick, and just basically putting work first at all times.”
Do you have one to add? What was considered “normal” in previous generations but is now considered strange, taboo, or out of fashion? Tell us in the comments or in this anonymous form.
