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I Regret To Inform You, But If You Remember Literally Any Of These 50 Things From Elementary School, You're Officially Old
1. If you’ve ever pure joy you felt when this TV got rolled in…
2. If you’ve ever washed your hands with this strange pink soap that only existed in schools…
3. Or this kind of soap…
4. Probably in a sink like this…
5. If you’ve ever hoped and prayed for your food of choice while looking at a cafeteria calendar…
6. If you’ve ever been assured getting underneath one of these will protect you from a nuclear bomb…
7. If you’ve ever been flung off one of these at 100 mph…
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8. If you’ve watched someone open one of these markers and immediately smelled its intense aroma…
9. If you’ve ever had to use this in a classroom…
10. If you’ve ever looked up and gazed upon the giant cursive letters all around the room…
11. And wrote some cursive on a piece of paper like this…
12. If you remember using these scissors that made your fingers feel IMMEDIATELY sore…
13. If you’ve ever stabbed your eraser so much it ended up looking like this…
14. If you ever tried to push all three levers of this pen down at the same time…
15. If you’ve eaten that ice cream that seemed to only be available at school…
16. If you ever used these little cute erasers that did not erase, only smudged further…
17. If you’ve ever sat in that unmistakable art class stool…
18. If you’ve ever fallen asleep in the back of class to a scene like this one…
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19. If you’ve ever created a masterpiece with this…
20. If you’ve ever opened up the sharpener to clean it out and smelled that unmistakable pencil shavings smell…
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21. If you remember first catching a glimpse of the hallowed Ball Room in gym class…
22. If your school had a cafeteria and the auditorium being the same room AKA the CAFETORIUM…
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23. If you’ve accidentally dropped one of these on the ground and saw it EXPLODE everywhere:
24. If you still remember the fool-proof way to draw a bird…
25. If you’ve ever felt that unmistakable static from one of these chairs…
26. If you remember eating one the best lunches imaginable: Chicken Patty Day…
27. If you’ve ever spent way too long learning how to spell bad words in your calculator…
28. If you ever did math with these little blocks…
29. If you remember those Halloween decorations that seemed to just appear…
30. If you remember those days in gym class where you had to put on a pinny that reeked of stale sweat…
31. If you ever ran your hand along the wall exactly like this…
32. If you ever told time on one of these little yellow clocks…
33. If you ever once truly believed that the blue part of this eraser could erase ink…
34. If you’ve ever drawn this exact sun on the corner of a page…
35. If you’ve ever given yourself a lead “shot”…
36. If you remember sitting in those chairs with tennis balls on them…
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37. If you’ve felt invincible after opening a fresh box of mechanical pencil lead…
38. And then broke your pencil for no reason…
39. If you’ve ever prayed to the snow gods…
40. If you’ve drawn some masterpieces using this ruler…
41. If you’ve put glue all over your hand and peeled it off like a madman…
42. If you’ve prepared for battle with a sword made out of markers…
43. If you collected all sorts of box tops in an effort to raise money…
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44. If you’ve put your hand on one of these tables in a science class and felt how cold it always was…
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45. If you’ve ever pulled this trick…
46. If you played on a splinter-full playground like this…
47. If you know what goes inside these…
48. If you’ve stayed home sick and spent the entire day watching this guy…
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49. If you’ve ever covered a text book in just a bunch of paper to keep it safe…
50. And if you’ve clapped together two erasers and saw that big giant toxic cloud of smoke…
John Phelan –
Then I’m sorry, you are officially old.
