As easy as the Brady Bunch made it look, adjusting to a blended family is not as easy as many parents think.
Not only are you dealing with the break up of your own parents, but you now also have to accept a new parental figure and their family into your life!
Well when this user’s Mom tried to force him to attend the birthday party of a half-sibling who had ignored him his whole life, he straight up refused!
Should he have put his personal feelings aside and been there for his “family”? Decide for yourself!
AITA for telling my parents I won’t go to my half sister’s birthday dinner?
My (17m) half sister (almost 27f) is turning 27 in two weeks.
Her husband and his family and my half brother (25m) have planned a birthday dinner for her and the ILs invited my parents, her mom and stepdad, and me.
Her husband then suggested it might be better if I stayed home since I’m not old enough to drink.
However, OP suspected that his age wasn’t the real issue…
But I know the real reason for the suggestion is my half siblings don’t really want anything to do with me.
They don’t want my dad around either but he gets invited because my mom wouldn’t go without him.
She also wouldn’t ever leave me behind from normal stuff so they invite me but they normally don’t talk to me.
If they do, it’s only basic “hi” and “bye” and if there are people there who’d question it, like mom.
OP said that their relationship had been an issue all his life…
Their dad, my mom’s first husband, died and mom remarried quickly. They never adjusted to that and they always kept my dad at a distance and me too.
I don’t think they hate us. But I know they wish mom hadn’t brought us into their lives. They tolerate our presence to keep mom.
But I have never felt loved, liked or cared for by them and I know they don’t consider me a sibling. I have heard them say they have one sibling only before.
The sister’s inlaws weren’t quite as bad, but definitely didn’t make OP feel welcome either…
Also, my half sister’s husband pretty much knows the way things are. Her ILs don’t seem to be as aware when they invited me so readily.
Both half siblings send me birthday cards and Christmas cards every year but they never reply if I say thanks.
They never reply to any texts or DMs I send, so I stopped reaching out except for the thanks.
And while OP’s Mom said things between him and his half-siblings were better now, OP wasn’t so sure…
My mom genuinely believes things are better now that they’re older. That I’m a sibling in their eyes. But I know it’s not true.
My mom and dad think I could still go to the dinner and they won’t drink either so we’ll be cool.
I told them I’d prefer to stay at home and if it was going to be a big deal, me being there, then they should go without me.
Although OP’s Mom tried to fight for him to be there, it was clear his half-siblings just didn’t want him there…
Mom called my half brother and he made like 100 excuses about why I should stay at home. Mom called him out for making it sound like he doesn’t want me to go.
She ended up calling my half sister then who also made a bunch of excuses.
When mom started to ask why it would be such a big deal to have me at a restaurant she said it was fine if I was there.
Understandably, OP wasn’t looking forward to the dinner after his siblings’ reactions…
I’m really not looking forward to the party so I told my parents I’m not going because I don’t want to go and they should go without me.
My mom was really upset about it and she told me I should be there to support my sister, that I shouldn’t let the excuses get me down because they really do want me there.
My dad told me as long as they’re civil like they are with him, as painful as it can be, we should still show up because we are a family at the end of the day.
So AITA?
Why would OP attend an event where he is so clearly not welcome? And what does it matter if he’s their “family” if they refuse to treat him like it?
Reddit responded with a resounding NTA, and told OP it was time to sit down and explain the situation to his Dad.
And this user said that you shouldn’t be forced to go where you’re not wanted.
And this user pointed out that if his siblings barely even acknowledge his existence, than OP is perfectly justified in skipping.
Finally, this half-sibling felt OP’s pain, and said they went through the same ordeal in their family!
Why does it matter, it doesn’t sound like his half-sister wants him there anyway!
If you liked that post, check out this story about a guy who was forced to sleep on the couch at his wife’s family’s house, so he went to a hotel instead.
