99 Tweets From British Twitter That Kept Us Laughing This Year
“Hey girl are you the North of England, because I want to promise you the greatest rail you’ve ever had and then immediately disappoint you.”
11.
I sometimes sit and think about the fact that Alexandra Burke got to do a duet with Beyoncé in the 2008 X Factor Final and in the very same final, JLS got a duet with Gary Barlow.
— oré olukoga (@OfficialOre) February 16, 2023
16.
Little boy on the train (to me): Want to know what my name is?
Me: Ok.
Little boy: It’s Artichoke Marie.
His mum: Kamal!
Little boy: Sshhh!— Miranda Keeling (@MirandaKeeling) February 21, 2023
17.
Sorry for eavesdropping but there are two French guys chatting nearby; one of them said ‘I have two brothers’ and went on to family pets, and it’s raised my hopes that maybe real French people do speak exclusively in the phrases you learn at GCSE level.
— In the bleak Mark Watson (@watsoncomedian) February 20, 2023
63.
drama in the school whatsapp chat! the PTA invited us all to a coronation party and one of the dads (who’s a professor of colonial history) said eat my dick
— Emma Szewczak (@EmmaSzewczak) May 3, 2023
64.
got separated from my dad (61, white, bald) at the bruce springsteen concert and it was like a live immersive experience of wheres wally
— das 🍊 (@das_penman) April 30, 2023
67.
hate pub quizzes sometimes, had to talk my friend down as he shouted “it can’t be that simple” after the quizmaster asked who was best man at Ant McPartlin’s wedding
— Ed Campbell (@edcmpbl) May 8, 2023
70.
“I MUST tell you,” said a lady with breathless excitement, stopping us suddenly as we walked down Bermondsey Street last night, “I MUST tell you that you are wearing the same clothes as that building.” and skipped off pic.twitter.com/sozkE2eMeL
— Tim Dunn (@MrTimDunn) May 11, 2023
74.
i’ve accidentally brought several sheets of custom Michael Caine stickers to the airport and i’m going to have to take them out of the country. worried they’re going to get flagged as Big Drugs or something. massive michael tabs pic.twitter.com/IrDmhxkzI1
— Beth McColl (@imbethmccoll) May 11, 2023
91.
Hey girl are you the North of England, because I want to promise you the greatest rail you’ve ever had and then immediately disappoint you.
— Differently Dave (@GoldenVision90) October 5, 2023
Thumbnail credits: CBS / BBC / ITV
